Sunday 27 May 2007


A friend of mine leaves all her packing until there's only an hour left before she has to go. The logic being that it can only then waste an hour of her time. I start about 3 days before we leave . Ergo , it takes 3 days. It goes something like this ... wash every item of clothing in the house, end up wearing at least 50% of newly washed items in the 3 days leading up to holiday , re-wash every item with only 1 day to go, end up being up until 1am on the day of departure having to iron knickers dry. Will I ever learn? Why don't I just wash every item the day before we go then we can't wear it and get it all dirty again. There's something very OCD about my packing style too. Toiletries have to be new, washbag has to be scrubbed, no creases, clean shoes, emergency suppliesin duplicate. It's a nightmare going on holiday and even worse coming home again. What's the answer ? A virutal holiday, in a flotation tank, followed by 3 days sleep plus laundry service , online shopping spree with cash saved . Bliss.

Thursday 10 May 2007

There's only one thing worse than being collared by one of your children's teachers and hearing the words .. 'I thought we ought to have a chat about your son' and that is coming home to an answermachine with a message from school that begins something along the lines of ... 'There's been an incident at school...'
I should know as I've had both. Although I'd rather have the ...'Incident at school type' as it normally involves nothing more serious than yet another prank or silly dismeanor , the last one involved a bottle of green food colouring, enough said.
The other variety involves your having to sit down in a teeny weeny chair that wouldn't accommodate an average sized bottom let alone my wayward arse. The teacher then bgins in a sympathetic tone that attempts to re-assure that it's nothing serious really which of course it is. Alarm bells start ringing then you hear the words , learning difficulty and your heart sinks. The next bit is a blur. There's usually something about it being better to catch it now whilst they're still young, then some feeble attempt at re-assurance along the lines of ' I'm sure it's nothing really' then there's the sting in the tail about how much it's all going to cost and all the while my only thoughts are of sadness , of lost potential , of nightmarish revision for exams , of the utter humiliation that you know your child is going to suffer knowing they're behind everyone else, of hating every other parent whose children win the prizes at the end of term , the scholarships the choice of whatever school they want to go to next. I've been here before. I was hoping for a normal school life for my youngest but sadly it's not to be. It's no consolation trying to belive the twaddle that you've been given difficult circumstances becaause you're strong and therefore better able to cope with them . I'd settle for mediocrity any day.