Sunday 27 August 2017

Normal for Norfolk ?

The I Spy pocket book to Norfolk ( remember them ? ) would now have to include the following :

Chelsea Tractor
Oh-so designer crumpled linen shirt
Cath Kidston shopper
Any item of clothing from either Joules or Boden
An overpriced crab sandwich ( £12 and upwards - it's a flipping sandwich ! )
Designer Deli
Three times cooked chips ( what's the matter with just once cooked chips ? )
The word 'Gastro' at the top of any pub menu
A £4 carparking ticket even if you only want to stop for 10 minutes.

Taking a pop at Social Stereotypes is easy ( but fair ) game , but the Chelsea-on-Sea brigade take the biscuit , or rather the sea-salt organic shortbread finger no doubt. They hunt in packs and emerge pale-faced from their 4X4s in search of something painted in a neutral Farrow and Ball paint shade.

I realised that when we last took the boys to Norfolk, we were camping, didn't wear linen, had an old banger of a car and wouldn't have paid more than a tenner for a fish and chip supper for all four of us. My how times have changed. I liked the fact that you had to walk at least a mile to get even a glimpse of the sea at low tide - all that fresh sea air . No trip was complete without the purchase of a lurid plastic bucket and a crabbing line , spied hanging from a hook outside the local newsagents' and maybe a cream tea if we were lucky.

The shopping oppurtunities these days are on another level. Surely there are only so many driftwood hearts, sailcloth bags or cashmere throws you can look at without getting shopper's fatigue. I didn't buy a thing. It was all just ' stuff '.

And as for eating, everything had 'gastro' tagged onto it or at least 3 superlative adjectives. A tomato is a tomato isn't it ? The 'Gourmet Norfolk' magazine in the hotel lobby was an exhaustive list of michelin megastars and designer delis. I really only wanted a crab sandwich.

I mustn't complain but I couldn't help feeling a little sorry for Norfolk resdients who have to put up with this invasion of the designer tourists throughout the summer.

1 comment:

  1. Oh how I smiled while reading this - whilst nodding my head in total agreement! How can they justify the prices (probably because the Chelsea tractor brigade don't feel they are eating up-market food unless it is expensive). I was a bit worried at first as I am the owner of a CK bag and Boden t-shirt but phew - don't look for any of the other things on a day out to the seaside. In fact, we are 'picnic on the green while waiting for the tide to go back out at Frinton-on-Sea' kind of people. Must be the 'Essex girl' in me!