Good Friday is not that good

Well it may have been for Jesus but so far it's poured with rain and the one place I wanted to visit was closed and the church I went to in order to light a candle had locked its doors ( on Good Friday - really ?) and I narrowly averted getting a parking tocket because apparently Good Friday doesn't count as a Bank Holiday - I beg to differ.

I need a project so I've taken on what I rather grandly refer to as a laundry room - otherwise known as a pokey cupboard off the kitchen. Kirstie Allsop would be relieved that I hadn't committed the heinous Dometic Goddess crime of having my washing appliances actually in the kitchen - God forbid.

You'd be amazed what has come out of that pokey little hell home or maybe you wouldn't because everyone has a Pandora's boxful of crap lurking somewhere in the house where they stash things they never use but can't bear to part with ... don't they ?

23 vases
2 microwavable neck pillow things
201 odd socks
3 fly swatters
1 mop bucket I haven't used in 20 odd years
1 candle making kit
Assorted bundles of garden rafia
1 picnic raclette set - oh yes we raclette the hell out of cheese every time we go on a picnic
8 bottles of various stain removers none of which have ever removed a single stain
21 underwater battery operated tealights
17 plastic trays
4 First Aid kits but I can never find a plaster when I need one
1 microwave egg poacher
2 laundry bags for fancy lingerie about as mush use as a chocolate teapot
1 Chocolate Teapot
1 Turkish coffee percolator
3 bottles of unctious liquid that came with some hideous stained glass diffuser contraption
Aforementioned Stained glass thing
A 3 tier wire cupcake display piece of nonsense
2 flocked black crows
5m of grimey vinyl tablecovering
3 , yes 3, boxes of cocktail sticks ....


On that last item, when did I ever think I would need around 300 cocktail sausages spiked ?

Feeling overwhelmed, I've come upstairs to escape, wondering when we'll ever be able to eat at our kitchen table again which is now piled high with sundry items. I've filled 3 binbags with junk and will be going back in to tackle the socks when I've written this. This may be the longest blog entry I've ever written. I've already googled Pinterest for Laundry Room inspiration which left me quivering with regret. They'd all been Cath Kidstoned to death and it's doubtful whether any laundry ever takes place in any of them. Don't go there if you don't want to spend the rest of the Bank Holiday wallowing in Pinterest envy - and yes Mr Parking Warden ... Good Friday IS a Bank Holiday actually.

Before and after photos to follow.

Spring Cleaning

Why on earth do we feel compelled to clean out our nests at this time of year ? I could set my clock by it.

I'm starting in the bedroom. The ghastly clothes have gone ( 3 bin bags full ) and now I've started on accessories. Down to a handful of bags ( smart, casual, cross-body, beach and shopper ) just 3 hats ( I never wear them anyway ) and now I've strated on scarves. What's with the scarves ? Ghastly chiifon ones, most I've never worn, masters of disguise ( big boobs ) , things with tassels and pom poms hanging off them ... the list is endless. Anything that was grey of beige ( greige ? ) has gone too. I've filled another binbag.

It's not as if I've ever worn any of them once, maybe twice.

Don't even start me on PJs. Christmas ones ( one day a year for goodness sake) , slinky ones, fluffy ones, ones that look like they belong to a 14 year old. I'm running out of bin bags.

Next stop wrapping paper. I've decided that only things associated with going to bed and waking up should be in the bedroom so that includes, dressing, hair drying, make-up and bedtime reading material. Why then is the bedroom now a multi-purpose sewing room, wrapping station, unwanted cushion depository and harbinger of boxes for items that might breakdown and need returning to the manufacturer ? Not to mention abandoned hobbies like calligraphy ( one of these days ) silversmithing, picture framing, quilting and beading.

Books have got out of control ever since DH dispensed with our bookshelves in favour of an antique boat in a glass cabinet that takes up half of the hallway. Coats have gone downstairs onto the coathooks, empty spectacle cases of which I have amassed about a dozen have gone in the bin. The emergency present drawer remains , used only last week when DH asked ( at 8am in the morning ) if I had any 'spare' gifts for a member of his staff who was into writing and travel. I came up trumps with a Moleskine Travelers Notebook and a wallet full of stylish pencils. And yes, I was able to provide an emergency wimple for a friend off to a Tarts and Vicars party without a costume and an outsized comedy sombrero when I needed to dress up as a Mexican bandit, all hauled from the emergency dressing up box that lurks in a bedroom cupboard drawer.

NO MORE . Bedrooms are for sleeping in. They are not a cabinet full of curiosities.

So, the next time I need a grey/beige, life sized rabbit costume or a tasselled and pom-pom adorned scarf with matching beach bag and I find that the cupboard is empty, I will only have myself to blame.

Never done things by halves

This year I'm turning Sixty - it was less scary to write it as a word rather than in numbers. I'm not at all perturbed by this. On the contrary, I say ' Bring It On ! ' In fact, I now realise that I've always expressed my age as that of the year in which I turn that age so I'm always one year ahead of the game. That's just my way of getting used to it. If you say it often enough you start to believe it and as I'm a September girl, I have a nine month run up to actually turning that age ,which seems to be enough time to get my head around it. So in fact, I've been feeling psychologically sixty for about a month now.

So it's the biggie. I hope there are many more but I'm realistically aware of the fact that as bodies age, their ability to remain supple, mobile and flexible dwindles - an inversely proportional problem ( I always see things in mathematical terms - an occupational hazard) . That's why I embarked on a training regime 3 months ago and have not only lost an impressive amount of weight but I've also started to slow down the ageing process ... up to a point.

There's no point in dealing with the physical aspects only, so I'm also embarking on a year of activities to nourish my soul and mind. It's also an excuse to start a new notebook as if I ever needed one ... excuse that is , not notebook, of which I have plenty.

So, here's the first item on the list so far ...

• Re-ignite my Scottish roots. This will include something to do with haggis on Burns Night and a visit to the Hebrides ( Outer not Inner.  Remember, I don't do things by halves ) . Why travel half way round the world to see turquoise waters when it's right on our doorstep here in the UK? I've always had a fantasy to rent a croft and re-invent myself as an Islander ever since watching Ring of Bright Water.  You know the way some films just have that effect on you ? You watch it and feel forever changed. This is also the sort of pipe dream statement that makes a Western Islander hopping mad and rightly so. I'm such a Londoner really.  This is what I'm expecting in my head ....

This may be closer to reality ...

More to follow... watch this space.

Welcome 2018

I am starting this year's musings 3 stone lighter and with a new resolve to take better care of myself.
Thanks to Cathy Zielske, all round good egg and funny lady, I have signed up for Fit 2018 - her online course designed to get you taking care and owning your helath - both physical and mental. Anything that gets you moving, crafting, writing and taking note of what's important in life gets my vote.

This is a big year - well aren't they all ? Well yes, but this year in particular is going to be HUGE. For starters I get to celebrate a pretty significant birthday. Eldest beloved son has just left home to set up a whole new life with his lovely girlfriend. Youngest beloved son is embarking on a trip of a lifetime to Tanzania to spread some love in the world and will then be leaving home in the Autumn to start his University adventure studying a subject which is so dear to his heart - music. The tragic loss of a very dear friend at the end of last year prompted him to seize life with both hands and make every moment count. Soemthing we should all be doing but somehow we get sidetracked from it by the minutiae of everyday life and all its tiresome details.

I aim to spend less time doing chores, cleaning and superfluous activities . With this in mind I am gently de-cluttering my personal posessions down to a capsule wardrobe ( 5 tops , 5 bottoms, one coat and just my undies ... big pants will have to go ) . My kitchen cupboards will contain wholesome and nutritious real foods and .... ( this is the BIG one ) I am aiming to reduce my spending dramatically to include only food, essential household items which will support the streamlining of my life. This will include a re-cycling bin, some basic fitness equipment and books - and that's all. Yeah right ... no really ... this is the plan. Let's see how much I manage to acheive.

Found this online - something in Sainsburys Gift Catalogue for Christmas called Seventh Heaven - a Basketful of Goodies . Sounds nice and natural ... until you read the ingredients...

Ingredients

• Red Hot Sauna: Propylene Glycol, Zeolite, Kaolin, Glycerin, Citrus Grandis (Grapefruit), Peel Oil, Panax Ginseng Root Extract, Cereus Grandiflorus (Cactus) Flower Extract, Oenothera Biennis (Evening Primrose) Flower Extract, Jasminum Officinale (Jasmine) Flower Extract, Citrus Aurantifolia (Lime) Peel Extract, Juglans Nigra (Black Walnut) Shell Extract, Cetyl Hydroxyethylcellulose, Parfum (Fragrance), Caprylic/Capric Triglyceride, Isopropyl Myristate, Limonene, CI 16035 (Red 40 Lake), 
• Passion Peel Off: Aqua (Purified Water), Polyvinyl Alcohol, Alcohol Denat. (Plant Origin), PPG-1-PEG-9 Lauryl Glycol Ether, PVP, Glucose (Sugar), Parfum (Fragrance), Xanthan Gum (Natural Thickener), Rubus Idaeus (Raspberry) Fruit Extract, Glycerin (Plant Origin), Propylene Glycol, Tocopheryl (Vitamin E) Acetate, Vitis Vinifera (Red Grape) Fruit Extract, Aloe Barbadensis (Aloe Vera) Leaf Juice, Potassium Iodide, Sodium Chloride (Mineral Origin), Punica Granatum (Pomegranate) Fruit Extract, Vaccinium Macrocarpon (Cranberry) Fruit Extract, Potassium Thiocyanate, Passiflora Incarnate (Passionflower) Flower Extract, Panax Ginseng Root Extract, Sorbitol (Plant Origin), Phenoxyethanol, Sodium Benzoate, Oenothera Biennis (Evening Primrose) Seed Extract, Nelumbo Nucifera (Lotus Blossom) Flower Extract, Potassium Sorbate, Lactoperoxidase (Milk Origin), Glucose Oxidase (Sugar, Origin), Sorbic Acid (Plant Origin), Citric Acid (Plant Origin), CI 16035 (Red 40), CI 42090 (Blue 1), 
• Fresh Feet: Alcohol Denat. (Plant Origin), Aqua (Purified Water), Tapioca Starch, Parfum (Fragrance), Mentha Piperita (Peppermint) Oil, Menthol (Cooling Agent), Acrylates/C10-30 Alkyl Acrylate Crosspolymer, Glycerin (Plant Origin), Mentha Vindis (Spearmint) Leaf Oil, Sodium Hydroxide, Limonene*, Linalool, Vaccinium Angustifolium (Blueberry) Fruit Extract, Potassium Sorbate, Sodium Benzoate, CI42090 (Blue 1), 
• Very Berry: Aqua (Purified Water), Glyceryl Stearate, SE (Plant Origin), Stearic Acid (Plant Origin), Glycol Stearate (Plant Origin), Glycerin (Plant Origin), Bentonite (Natural Clay), Glyceryl Stearate (Plant Origin), Coco-Glucoside (Plant Origin), Prunus Persica (Peach) Kernel Oil, Mica (Mineral Origin), PEG-100 Stearate, Phenoxyethanol, Xanthan Gum (Plant Origin), Propylene Glycol, Caprylyl Glycol, Parfum (Fragrance), Rubus Idaeus (Raspberry) Fruit Extract, Aloe Barbadensis (Aloe Vera) Leaf Juice, Vitis Vinifera (Grape) Fruit Extract, Vaccinium Macrocarpon (Cranberry) Fruit Extract, Vaccinium Angustifolium (Blueberry) Fruit Extract, Potassium Sorbate, Sodium Benzoate, Citric Acid (Plant Origin), CI 77891 (Titanium Dioxide), CI 15850 (Red 7 Lake), CI 42090 (Blue 1 Lake), 
• Manuka Honey Peel Off: Aqua (Purified Water), Polyvinyl Alcohol, PPG-1-PEG-9 Lauryl Glycol Ether, PVP, Phenoxyethanol, Parfum (Fragrance), Propylene Glycol, Xanthan Gum (Natural Thickener), Caprylyl Glycol, Caramel, Mel (Honey), Aloe Barbadensis (Aloe Vera) Leaf Extract, Sorbitol, Aesculus Hippocastanum (Horsechestnut) Seed Extract, Anthemis Nobilis (Chamomile) Flower Extract, Vanilla Planifolia (Vanilla) Fruit Extract, Jasminum Officinale (Jasmine) Flower Extract, Sodium Benzoate, Sorbic Acid, CI 19140 (Yellow 5), CI 14700 (Red 4), 
• Avocado Oil: Aqua (Purified Water), Bentonite (Natural Clay). Glyceryl Stearate SE (Plant Origin), Stearic Acid (Plant Origin), Glycerin (Plant Origin), Glycol Stearate (Plant Origin), Juglans Regia (Walnut) Shell Powder, Glyceryl Stearate (Plant Origin), Coco-Glucoside (Plant Origin), Mica (Natural Mineral), PEG-100 Stearate, Glucose (Sugar), Xanthan Gum (Natural Thickener), Parfum (Fragrance), Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis (Sweet Almond) Oil, Persea Gratissima (Avocado) Oil, Potassium Iodide, Sodium Chloride (Mineral Origin), Camellia Sinensis (Green Tea) Leaf Extract, Panax Ginseng Root Extract, Oenothera Biennis (Evening Primrose) Flower Extract, Aloe Barbadensis (Aloe Vera) Leaf Juice, Potassium Thiocyanate, Lactoperoxidase (Milk Origin), Sodium Benzoate, Glucose Oxidase (Sugar Origin), Sorbic Acid, CI 77891 (Titanium Dioxide) (Natural Pigment), CI 19140 (Yellow 5), CI 42090 (Blue 1), 
• Dead Sea Mud Pac: Aqua (Purified Water), Kaolin (Mineral Origin), Glycerin (Plant Origin). Alcohol Denat. (Plant Origin), Glyceryl Stearate SE (Plant Origin), Sodium Citrate, Polysorbate 20 (Mild Cleanser), Maris Sal (Dead Sea Salt), Glucose (Sugar), Citric Acid (Plant Origin), Parfum (Fragrance), Fucus Vesiculosus (Seaweed) Extract, Silk (Dead Sea Mud), Potassium Iodide, Sodium Chloride (Mineral Origin), Potassium Thiocyante, Potassium Sorbate, Sodium Benzoate, Lavandula Angustifolia (Lavender) Oil, Citrus Aurantium Bergamia (Bergamot) Fruit Oil, Lactoperoxidase (Milk Origin), Glucose Oxidase (Sugar Origin), CI 42090 (Blue 1), 
• Pulped Papaya Rescue: Aqua (Purified Water), Cetearyl Alcohol (Plant Origin), Brassicamidopropyl Dimethylamine (Plant Origin), Cocos Nucifera (Coconut) Oil, Coco-Caprylate (Plant Origin), Aspartic Acid, Cetearyl Glucoside (Plant Origin), Parfum (Fragrance), Sodium Benzoate, Benzyl Alcohol, Citric Acid, Glycerin (Plant Origin), Carica Papaya (Papaya) Seed Oil, Panthenol (Pro-Vitamin B5), Persea Gratissima (Avocado) Oil, Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis (Sweet Almond) Oil, Carica Papaya (Papaya) Fruit Extract, Lycium Chinense (Goji Berry) Fruit Extract, Potassium Sorbate, Citronellol, Geraniol* Hexyl Cinnamal*, Butylphenyl Methylpropional, Limonene*, Linalool*, CI 15985 (Yellow 6), CI 14700 (Red 4), 
• Cucumber Peel Off: Aqua (Purified Water), Alcohol Denat. (Plant Origin), Polyvinyl Alcohol, PPG-1-PEG-9 Lauryl Glycol Ether, Propylene Glycol, PVP, Glycerin (Plant Origin), Limonene*, Cucumis Sativus (Cucumber) Fruit Extract, Citrus Aurantifolia (Lime) Oil, Linalool*, Citrus Aurantium Bergamia (Bergamot) Fruit Oil, Tocopheryl (Vitamin E) Acetate, Cereus Grandiflorus (Cactus) Flower Extract, Citrus Aurantifolia (Lime) Fruit Extract, Jasminum Officinale (Jasmine) Flower Extract, Juglans Regia (Walnut) Shell Extract, Oenothera Biennis (Evening Primrose) Flower Extract, Panax Ginseng Root Extract, Phenoxyethanol, Sorbitol (Plant Origin), Potassium Sorbate, Sodium Benzoate, Sorbic Acid (Plant Origin), CI 19140 (Yellow 5), CI 42090 (Blue 1), 
• Coconut Protein Rescue: Aqua (Purified Water), Cetearyl Alcohol (Plant Origin), Cocos Nucifera (Coconut) Oil, Brassicamidopropyl Dimethylamine (Pant Origin), Coco-Caprylate (Plant Origin), Aspartic Acid, Parfum (Fragrance), Hydrolyzed Quinoa (Natural Protein Conditioner), Sodium Benzoate, Benzyl Alcohol, Citric Acid, Coumarin*, 
• Bath Bomb ingredients: Sodium Bicarbonate, Citric Acid, Sodium Sulfate, Pentasodium Triphosphate, Isopropyl Palmitate, Talc, Cellulose Gum, Parfum (Fragrance), Sodium C14-16 Olefin Sulfonate, PEG-8, Benzyl Benzoate, Hexyl Cinnamal

Shame on you Sainsburys.

A little reminder ....

....  as to how far I've come. I don't ever want to go back there.

I said that last time but I've learnt a lot since then. I promised myself I would never drift back to the land of baggy, shapeless, stretchy clothes that I thought I could hide behindand I did but never again. Once bitten , twice shy.

I kept this hanger from a dress I bought for a wedding this summer. I looked like an inflated balloon in it. I tried it on again this morning and I couldn't beleive that I'd once filled it. I loved the dress, just hated the size lable. I'm planning on having it taken in once I've reached my goal weight just as a little reminder.

The hanger has gone in the bin.

Good old Sainsbury's

The only thing that pleases me about having to go to the supermarket , is the prospect of checking out what other things they have besides food.

Today I found this adorable stationery range.

A Filofax compatible planner in a very subtle platinum gold finish complete with a 2018 diary, pen loop and credit card holder flap inside. All that for just £6. The wallet that has a treasury tag style closure was a mere £4.

Then I found these in a beuatiful midnight blue and rose gold.

Notebook

Pencil Case

and Weekly Desk Planner.

The quality is superb. An equal match to anything Kate Spade or the likes could produce and at a fraction of the price. Good old Sainsburys.

Slimmer of the Week

... well chuffed and another shiny sticket for the fridge !

Childish I know but there's nothing like a bit of recognition to make your chest swell ( not that I need that - trying to get my measurements down! )

Only 1.5 lbs away from having lost 10% of my body weight and a mere 3.5 lbs away from 2 whole stone.

7000 Jars of Beer

Well the name of this shop has a lot to like about it . Had to go inside and check it out . It's only just opened in Kingston - Unit 11 Crown Arcade it says on their busimess card but the website lists the address as 1 Crown Passage - you can't miss it - it will have this lovely sandwich board propped up outside.

What a find . I didn't count the number of beers they stocked but I did take a photo of one of their shelves. Beautifully displayed - real eye candy.

As I'm putting together a beer advent calendar for my husband this year , I feel I may be paying them a visit or three.

But the thing I liked best was their idea of offering beer tasting ... with a tasting cheese plate . Positievly inspired. There are a number of tables and chairs arranged convivially and I'm guessing  they'll have a wealth of advice on offer. better still , they're open until 8pm or 9pm on most evenings - check here first .

It's so important to support local enterprises so pop along and try them out for yourself.

May well see you there. ... oh and I've just seen from their website that they also stock gins and wines ... two more reasons to book a date. I think I may arrange for my 2 sons to take dad out for a tipple- what a nice way to spend an Autumn evening.

Full Nest

Thought I was going to have an empty nest this Autumn but seems like I can't get rid of the boys just yet. Eldest will be moving out soon , I'm guessing, to live with his girlfriend and youngest is taking a Gap Year and will be off to Tanzania with Raleigh International soon. But until then, the fridge will have to remain filled to the brim and assorted clothes will be dropped and left on the bathroom floor.

In the meantime, youngest son's friends are all off to Uni. To remind them of the many happy Pizza and Chocolate Brownie evenings spent round at our house these last few years, I've made them all a box of brownies to take with them ( and a pizza cutter tucked inside the box ) . Loving the sweetest Mama Elephant cat stamps that I used to decorate the tags ... and I bought the self assembly boxes at Ally Pally last weekend. They fit  the 8" x 8" cake tine that baked the brownies perfectly . Love it when a plan comes together.

Another 2.5 lbs off

I've now lost a grand total of one and a half stone in 8 weeks. It must have been the stress of last night ( see previous post ) and the miles of walking from gate to gate at the O2 arena ! Wished I'd been wearing my Fit Bit . I reckon I must have clocked up at least 10 000 steps !

Onward and downward.

FOO

I'm wondering if I love this band so much because their name spells FOOD without the D ? Nah , it's becuase they are super awesome beyond belief.

So, rewind to Tuesday 19th September. Eldest son and I emerge from the over-stuffed Jubilee line, blinking, into the September sunshine in Millenium Way , home to the O2. I get that thrill I always do when I'm about to hear live music. Not just any live music ... Foo Fighters Live. Does it get any better ?

The tickets have been pinned to my pinboard these last few months and the countdown to showtime has been agonising but here we are at last. This is the very first item on my bucket list and I can barely contain myself. Eldest son saw them live at Reading . Was I jealous ? Heck yes.

And then it all fell apart at the seams. Denied entry at the door because our tickets, bought through Viagogo ( one of the O2s recommnded partner agencies ) didn't match my ID. Naiively I didn't even realise there was a name on our tickets but there it was in tiny print at the bottom and it wasn't my name.

We weren't the only ones. Hundered of fans were similarly turned away . The whole place was a blubbery mess of sobbing fans incapable of believing that despite Viagogos claims that you will not be turned away if the name on your ticket doesn't match yours, this turned out to be a lie.

Those who know me will also know that "Don't ever take NO for an answer" is my motto ( incidentaally I'd like that on my tombstone ). I can't begin to articulate how indescribably disappointed we were. That word doesn't even come close.

The band were due on stage in 30 minutes. We had to walk the mile perimeter of the whole fecking venue to the Box Office to plead our case ... along with, by now , probably thousands of others in the same boat. The queue was a mile long - not a chance.

People who'd been bought tickets as gifts were also being turned away because they weren't the original purchaser. Groups of fans who'd arrived separately were being turned away because they'd planned to meet their friends ( and also original purchasers ) of their tickets inside the venue and they were already inside and had been told they wouldn't be given re-admission if  they came outside to meet their friends and prove their genuine identity . It was crazy.

The press turned up and took photos of the whole sorry mess. An angry mob had begun to gather and no-one was getting inside becasue of the backlog now of indignant fans who'd been fleeced . The fact that this stipulation had been implemenetd on the night with no prior notice ( despite what some claimed ) was appalling.

By 9pm half the seats inside were empty ... apart of course from all the record company execs and  hospitality freeloaders. At one point, a man in a wheelchair was denied entry because his partner ( whose name was on the tickets as original purchaser ) had used the disabled entrance separately to his partner who wasn't entitled to accompany him as she wasn't disabled , to access his wheelchair poition by the side if the stage. At this point I saw red.

I wasn't going to be bullied by the jobsworth at the gate in the high-viz jacket who was relishing the drama. I refused to move and wasn't going to be intimidated by his threat to have me evicted from the building. Fortunately I wasn't alone and we stood our ground ... a crowd of several hundered started chanting - " Get your manager here NOW ".

With a minute to go they finally relented. Stress levels on a scale of one to ten were about eleven.

So, what's the answer ? O2 management cannot not only endorse but actually operate in partnership with re-sale ticket agencies and then change the goalpost at the last minute. They are only too keen to offload blocks of tickets at a premium to agencies to do theitr selling for them when it suits them.

Get your act together O2 .

Another 2lbs.

... which brings my total to 16.5 lbs.

Thought I was going to put on (at least ) a pound this week given that we'd had husband's birthday on Friday along with a weekend away with relatives where the home baking , in the form of chocolate cake, flapjacks and plum and almond tart with custard, came thick and fast to the table. Managed to resist absolutely everything and felt very virtuous. Even managed to select a half decent salad at M&S at the motorway services en route.

This is proving to be surprisingly manageable.

Sizzix Bargains

Two things:

1. I have become addicted to dies  
2. I didn't know Sizzix offered such amazing bargains in their clearance section

In combination, these two facts proved fatal. I ordered a few items only yesterday and they arrived today.

The Tim Holtz sets of script words were only £3.75 each reduced from £15 and the Framelets set of polaroid frames were only £3 down from £12, That's a whopping saving of over £42.

The  3D Textured Impressions folder wasn't on offer but I'd been waiting for it to be released and it's gorgeous.  Incredibly sturdy and gives a lusciously deep impression.

So ... having saved that much ... what can I go spend it on !?

First stone off ...

... and boy does it feel good. Haven't noticed many body size changes yet but I did find I kept having to hoik my jeans up the other day. It truly is enlightening to emabark on a weight loss programme , no pun intended. I get quite evangelical about it . I don't need any more encouragement after watching "Embarassing Fat Bodies " last night.

It takes a while to re-adjust but as I've always cooked from scratch, it's not as daunting for me as it must be for others. I never really used to buy many processed foods either so no great deprivation there. Cutting out alcohol is tough and I've been very strict about it because I don'y want to be tempted to lapse. Yes, I have had the ocassional glass of red wine but I've kept it to an absolute minimum. I spend all my 'syns' on good fats like olive oil and avocado . Feeling very virtuous. I just need to stop getting on the scales every five minutes as if I don't trust that the weight will come off. It will. I just need to be patient.

Went window shopping for new clothes yesterday . I have my eye on so many beuatiful things but I may not be squeezing into them just yet so I'm only looking and reminding myself what beutiful brands there are out there. Last time I lost weight I was stoney broke and barely bought a single thread unless it came from a charity shop. Looking forward to having a bit of a pre Christmas splurge in a couple of months time.

Normal for Norfolk ?

The I Spy pocket book to Norfolk ( remember them ? ) would now have to include the following :

Chelsea Tractor
Oh-so designer crumpled linen shirt
Cath Kidston shopper
Any item of clothing from either Joules or Boden
An overpriced crab sandwich ( £12 and upwards - it's a flipping sandwich ! )
Designer Deli
Three times cooked chips ( what's the matter with just once cooked chips ? )
The word 'Gastro' at the top of any pub menu
A £4 carparking ticket even if you only want to stop for 10 minutes.


Taking a pop at Social Stereotypes is easy ( but fair ) game , but the Chelsea-on-Sea brigade take the biscuit , or rather the sea-salt organic shortbread finger no doubt. They hunt in packs and emerge pale-faced from their 4X4s in search of something painted in a neutral Farrow and Ball paint shade.

I realised that when we last took the boys to Norfolk, we were camping, didn't wear linen, had an old banger of a car and wouldn't have paid more than a tenner for a fish and chip supper for all four of us. My how times have changed. I liked the fact that you had to walk at least a mile to get even a glimpse of the sea at low tide - all that fresh sea air . No trip was complete without the purchase of a lurid plastic bucket and a crabbing line , spied hanging from a hook outside the local newsagents' and maybe a cream tea if we were lucky.

The shopping oppurtunities these days are on another level. Surely there are only so many driftwood hearts, sailcloth bags or cashmere throws you can look at without getting shopper's fatigue. I didn't buy a thing. It was all just ' stuff '.

And as for eating, everything had 'gastro' tagged onto it or at least 3 superlative adjectives. A tomato is a tomato isn't it ? The 'Gourmet Norfolk' magazine in the hotel lobby was an exhaustive list of michelin megastars and designer delis. I really only wanted a crab sandwich.

I mustn't complain but I couldn't help feeling a little sorry for Norfolk resdients who have to put up with this invasion of the designer tourists throughout the summer.

Saturday Night

Good grief I hate it with a vengeance.

The teenage years were spent worrying that we didn't have an exciting enough plan and might get caught not going out at all - a heinous crime. The opening music to MOTD still strikes a chord of fear in my heart - that would mean we were either stood up ( or down ) for a night's raving and had to spend the evening in our bedroom listening to sad love songs on Radio Caroline assuming that the rest of our tribe were out furiously partying somewhere whilst Dad was downstairs watching the footy and Mum would be checking her pools coupon. For those of you under 50, none of the above will make sense.

Then there were the early married years where, being married to someone in the TV business, I'd usually end up on my own whilst new husband would be out filming or recording some show or other.

After that there were the early baby years when you'd be knackered and asleep on the sofa by 8pm. The promise of a night in with a bottle of red wine thwarted by the fact that you'd be legless after half a glass, and longing for an hour of sleep in the certain knowledge that you'd be up at 2am , 4am and 5am with a crying infant.

I'm not sure what came next, I think it was the skint years when if your mortgage hadn't emptied your bank account, then unpaid maternity leave would have created a sizeable hole in finances. The mere thought of squandering a small fortune on a night out was unthinkable when it was toss up between getting the car serviced or having the boiler fixed.

Next came the fat years when the thought of jostling alongside stick-thin size zeros at a night club in a pair of extra stretchy black leggings and an over sized T shirt ( the fat person's sorry uniform ) were filled with dread and desperation.

So here I am in the pre- retirement years with a grumpy husband and a pair of youngsters, for whom every night is potentially party night , still penniless and fat with no desire whatsoever to muster enough energy for an evening on the town, let alone the company of the 'happily -marrieds' , or the 'just back from a holiday of a lifetimes' or worse still the perenially skinnies with an appetite like a horse and the metabolsim of a gazelle, complaining that a size 8 is too baggy on them.

Our Saturday night bust-up last night revolved around my asking husband for some help with what seems like my never-ending mission to de-clutter the house. This ultimately involved my piling a lifetime's photographs and scrapbboks into a crate and dumping it by the back door ready for the binmen next week. If nobody in the house can ever be bothered to look at or even acknowledge them, then why shoudl I ? I've been carfeully recording and archiving our collective memories for the last decade in the beleagured hope that someone someday might actually show an interest. Fat chance.

Let's face it, scrapbooking is just an excuse to hang on to the past and indulge in obscene levels of expenditure in the hope that it might fill a void or render our memories meaningful. So it was that I found myself last night leaving the house - YES - on a Saturday night - and driving round aimlessly looking for some form of solace or refuge. It struck me that unless you want to sit in the corner of an anonymous pub nursing a warm pint with a bunch of sorry solitary drunks, there aren't a lot of options for the lonely.

I ended up at a 24 hour Tescos - the saddest place on earth on a Saturday night where sales of meals for one and hard liquor probably peak at around 9pm. The coffee shop was closed so I resorted to a saunter round the magazine aisle wondering who on earth buys Practical Sheep Rearing or worse - Esquire ( Get the lowdown on popular culture as well as great advice on women, sex and gadgets and more ! )  - yes that's what it actually says on the cover complete with exclamation mark.  I resisted a dozen Krispy Kremes and left with a clutch of 'back to school' stationery although I have 2 boys who've both finished their school eduaction. You never know when you might need a 10 pack of file dividers though.

Streets are empty by 9pm and car parks are no-go areas unless you want to be mistaken for looking for something else other than a quiet place to park up and reflect. Enough said. Restaurants are full of groups or couples and you never know what sort of a weirdo might come and sit next to you if you end up at the cinema.

And so it was that another Saturday came to a sorry end and I returned home, parked up and went to bed. My only victory was that I'd managed to survive it without resorting to food or booze. A victory in itself.

Smoasting Season has begun

Yes, the Social Media Boasting season, or SMoasting season as I like to call it, has flung open its doors as it always does after results day.

The most hilarious example I received was online from a 'friend' .

"How did you do at Slimming Wold last night ? " she asked innocently.

"3lbs" I replied knowing full well why she'd got in touch

"2lbs" she countered, adding , " Oh and [insert son's name here] got A* A* A and he was only 2 marks off a third A* - so we're having his paper re-marked "

I could have wet myself laughing.

Youngest son did so well but I'm not about to splash his grades across Facebook for the world to see. No gloating here. I'll let close friends and family know privately ... if they ask .... but I'm content to let him smile quietly to himself in the knowledge that he worked his socks off, acheived the kind of success of which he can be proud and let the rest of the helicopter Mums brag from the rooftops that their offspring are clearly child geniuses ... then wait for them to unravel when they get out into the big bad world and realise that one of the finest gifts your parents could have bestowed on you , is that of quiet modesty.  

Week Three at Slimming World

All the threes - end of third week , third weigh-in - 3lbs lost for the week - Hurrah.

I was worried I might only scrape my target of 2.5lbs but I managed to exceed it thankfully. That included two sneaky but small glasses of wine during the week and a meal out so I'm particularly chuffed.

I'm saving my syns for tomorrow night when we'll either be celebrating or commiserating youngest son's A Level results. The champagne is on ice.

Careful what you wish for

At some stage in my life I must have mentioned that I liked Snoopy. For every birthday, Christmas and Valentine's Day thereafter , I amassed a sizable collection. Strangely I chose to keep them all and now can't bear to part with them. Most of them were from a boyfriend during my university days. He'd send them to me for no other reason than to say he missed me. How sweet. I think I appreciate them more today than I ever did back then. And here are just a few of them, and yes ... they're going in the trunk.